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Why You Should Have More Children

Have you ever thought about having a few more kids?

I’m convinced that bigger families are better and when I say bigger I mean at least 3 children.  Not long ago I wrote a post called  20 Benefits of Having a Bunch of Kids, check it out for a few more reasons.

The Suko family with both sets of grandparents

The Suko family with both sets of grandparents

Puppies vs people

It always amazes me when I learn that a couple has decided to only have one child or worse yet the couple decides to buy a puppy instead!

Puppies and people are not the same! Unfortunately the feelings and reasoning that go into the decision to buy a cute little wet nosed Schnauzer is often the same approach taken by perspective parents.

I’ll admit there are some similarities to puppies and children, after all both are cute, both are great for snuggling, both are playful and both have a tendency to make stinky messes in the house but that’s where the similarities end!

If you’re a perspective parent thinking about having a darling child who will fulfill your urge to snuggle as you watch your favorite TV shows every evening, you need to stop now! Maybe a Schnauzer would be a better choice for you!

On the other hand if you have a more realistic conception of what parenting is, I want to offer you a few reasons why you should have more children.

A big family is better for you (but not in the way you think)

Here’s the deal, kids force you to do things you’d never do otherwise and the more you have the greater the effect!

It’s hard to remain selfish or proud when your constantly wiping someone else’s nose and uh…. well you know where I’m going with this!  I can’t tell you how many times I’ve had to put aside my pride while my child screamed in a public place or did some other humbling behavior.

My children also stretch my faith. We trusted the Lord more than ever when our 1 year old was diagnosed with cancer. These are unpleasant times and yet precious times.  The Lord shows us that even as parents we still have a Father who takes care of us!

Most of all my children teach me that I’m not perfect and that we are all learning together to be better children of our Heavenly Father.

These are all lessons that I never expected to learn and may not have learned if it weren’t for the 5 blessings God has given me!

A big family is better for your children

Children don’t do well on their own. They need parents and they need other children.  Learning to live with others is a vital life skill.

A house full of children means that every child must learn to get along, must have responsibility and must cultivate communication skills.  There’s far less chance that any one child will be the center of attention. Children learn to share bedrooms, clothing, toys and food! They don’t expect the world to be given to them on a platter!

There are too many parents who limit family size because they feel that every child needs their own bedroom. This is a terrible way to prepare your child for marriage where they’ll most likely be sharing not only a bedroom but also a bed!

In the long run children who grow up in large families have a much easier time adjusting to real life outside the home and they’re better prepared for marriage and starting a family of their own.

Question: Did you grow up in a big family? What are some other benefits of having 3 or more children?

24 Responses
  • Tami Dean
    August 22, 2013

    The kids always have someone to play with when there are five (we have a new child in our home that we will be adopting, so we are at five now, ages 10-14). And your heart just grows with each child – the amount of love you have to give multiplies!

    • Caleb
      August 22, 2013

      That’s a great point Tami! Blessings to your 5 kids, I hope we can meet them all when we are in the US!

      • Tami Dean
        August 22, 2013

        My kids also want me to add that it’s much easier to clean the house with all the helping hands, it increases teamwork, and there will be more kids to support us in our old age! And more grandkids in the future, as well as lots of family to visit each other. BIG family reunions. Abby says it’s good to have 5 kids because when you’re deciding on something you have lots of people to give you advice.

        • Caleb
          August 22, 2013

          That’s great! I love teaching my kids to clean the house and I’m really looking forward to grandkids down the road! Great comments from your kids!

  • Dave Arnold
    August 23, 2013

    I think of psalm 128. God’s heart is for the family – it’s the most important thing. My wife & I love 19 Kids & Counting. Have you seen it?

    • Caleb
      August 23, 2013

      Yes, my wife has watched 19 kids and counting a few times. She like it too, that’s an amazing family!

    • Dan Black
      August 26, 2013

      That show is crazy!

      • Caleb
        August 26, 2013

        Dan, you mean crazy in the sense of how well run their family is? I don’t know how they do it, our household can be crazy and we just have 5!

  • sexwithinmarriage
    August 23, 2013

    Grew up one of four, my wife one of five. My brother has four kids, as do I. its awesome getting together at my parents house with all the kids running around entertaining themselves.

    • Caleb
      August 23, 2013

      I grew up one of 8 and now have 5 of my own! I think my parents have 17 grandchildren currently but the # is still growing. I can’t wait until I get a few grandkids of my own!

  • Chris Peek
    August 23, 2013

    This line really hits home for me – “Here’s the deal, kids force you to do things you’d never do otherwise and the more you have the greater the effect!”

    We’re having our first in February. As with many new opportunities in life, I’m viewing it as a new adventure. And I have no doubt he/she will sand down the rough edges of my selfishness.

    I had one sister growing up, and to this day, I still wish I had a brother that I could call anytime and take adventures with.

    • Caleb
      August 23, 2013

      Chris, blessings on your first child! You have a lot to look forward to and I’m sure God will use your child to strengthen your faith in ways you would have never imagined!

  • Loren Pinilis
    August 23, 2013

    Wow, never knew you had a little child with cancer. Our oldest had seizures when he was 11 months old, so I can get close enough to only imagine what you were going through.
    You make a good point here about having a large family. What would you say about people who are concerned that you can’t afford a large family?

    • Caleb
      August 23, 2013

      Yes, our second child had cancer when he was about 20 months. I should probably do a post on it sometime.

      I think the whole finance and large families also deserves another post. Here’s the thing, it’s mainly a 1st world problem when people claim they can’t afford more kids. Often what they really mean is that they can’t afford to send them through college or give them their own bedroom.

      • TCAvey
        August 23, 2013

        Look forward to your future posts.

  • TCAvey
    August 23, 2013

    I grew up basically as an only child since my (half) siblings were so much older and didn’t live with in the same house with me. I never really thought I missed out on anything growing up, never thought, “I wish I had a brother or sister to play with”.

    However, now that I have one son I find that giving him siblings is a motivating factor for us having more (praying about extending our family through adoption and/or biologically).

    • Caleb
      August 24, 2013

      Adoption is a great way to add siblings to the family. It’s a blessing for everyone, especially the child who was adopted. Thanks for sharing TC!

  • Ngina Otiende
    August 24, 2013

    I am the last born in a family of 9 kids. It’s funny how when we were growing up, we complained so much about being too many. We felt like everything was a struggle and thought that a family with less kids had an easier life! Our mum always asked us “who amongst the nine of you would you rather not have as a sibling” (as kids we’d have answers!). And being the last, it never occurred to me that amongst all the kids, i was the highest candidate for “absent sibling”!

    A large family is fun, not easy to bring up in one sense, but more rewarding on a whole other level.

    • Caleb
      August 24, 2013

      Ok, Ngina you know what big families are all about! I grew up in a family with 8 kids! We complained sometimes too but overall we knew it was a blessing and would never change it.

  • Dan Black
    August 26, 2013

    Children can really cause us to be selfless and practice servant leadership. I was the youngest child with 2 siblings. Great post and thoughts!

    • Caleb
      August 26, 2013

      Good point about servant leadership. Growing up in a big family means you get to practice that early on.

  • Mike Holmes
    August 26, 2013

    I was the youngest and had an older sister, my wife was the youngest sister with an older brother, and no we have 2 kids go figure! We stopped at 2 though. Physically she is not able to birth anymore. But I personally, do want to adopt a 3rd child.

  • Barb Raveling
    August 27, 2013

    I grew up one of four, and we have four of our own – wish we’d had a couple more! Our kids have enriched our lives so more and I do believe it’s good for the kids. I also think it’s good to have a lot just so you can’t give them everything they want. We have helped our kids out with college, but they have to pay a good share as well (more than we pay). Have had three kids in college so far and they all feel proud that they’re paying for so much of it. It makes them feel like they’ve done something and aren’t being babied. Plus their friends also work – not easy, but it better prepares them for life after college which also isn’t easy!