This is Not Modesty!

There’s only one body part women are commanded to cover in the church and for the most part they don’t do it! At least not in the Western Church.

I’ve seen so many post recently on modesty and they all seem to have the same things in common and they all seem to get the same things wrong!

Modesty Is About How Much Skin You Show Error

The most common error I see in the modesty debate is those who say it’s all about what parts of the body you cover, how much skin you show, and how tight your clothing is.

Then there’s the debates about types of clothing like yoga pants, bikinis, and halter tops.

The main problem here is that the Bible doesn’t say anything about any of these!

I’m not sure where the modesty debate got derailed and began to focus way too much attention on how much or how little women’s clothing revealed but what I am sure is that it didn’t start from a close and careful reading of the Bible.

The Only Body Part Women Are Commanded to Cover

There is one exception. The New Testament commands women to cover one body part. Unfortunately, this clear and simple commandment is one that is often overlooked in the church.

So if a woman does not cover her head, she should cut off her hair. If it is a disgrace for a woman to cut off her hair or shave her head, let her cover her own head.
(1Co 11:6)

I don’t think Paul could have been clearer. Women should cover their head. The application of this commandment may look different in different cultures but there it is, the only body part women are commanded to cover.

Modesty Is Just a Matter of the Heart Error

The second error I often come across is the one that says modesty is only about the intentions of a woman’s heart. Thus, as long as her greatest desire is to honor God then she is modest no matter what she wears and no matter how much skin she reveals.

The problem is that the Bible talks about more than what’s in the heart, it also talks about what’s on the outside. While intentions of the heart are of far more importance than the outward appearance, that doesn’t mean our clothes and fashion are of no importance.

Modesty in the Church

Amazingly the Bible only mentions modesty in the church twice and both of those references are in 1 Timothy.

The first is in reference to women.

Women, for their part, should display their beauty by dressing modestly and decently in appropriate clothes, not with elaborate hairstyles or by wearing gold, pearls, or expensive clothes, but through good actions. This is proper for women who claim to revere God.
(1Ti 2:9-10)

The second is in reference to male church leaders.

Therefore, an elder must be blameless, the husband of one wife, stable, sensible, respectable, hospitable to strangers, and teachable.
(1Ti 3:2)

The Meaning of Modesty

The word translated “modestly” in 1 Timothy 2:9 and “respectable” in 1 Timothy 3:2 is the Greek work “kosmios.” It comes from the word “kosmos,” which usually refers the created universe, a universe that the Greeks believed displayed the highest level of order.

Thus “kosmios” is a reference to something that is ordered, thought-out and structured well.

In the context of 1 Timothy 2:9 modesty is in contrast to “gold, pearls and expensive clothing.” The problem wasn’t that they wore too little clothing but rather too much! Their fashion was a statement of their wealth and their position in society.

They were calling attention to themselves rather than pointing people to Christ!

Thus when Paul exhorts the women to “dress modestly” he’s not necessarily telling them to cover-up. What he is telling them to do is to think about how their choice of clothing is affecting others, he’s asking them use common sense and dress in a way that isn’t distracting.

The word “kosmios” in 1 Timothy 3:9 isn’t usually translated modest but rather, decent, respectable, or well-behaved. This usage refers to much more than clothing and describes the overall pattern of life that an elder in the church should lead.

3 Things We Need to Stop Doing

Now that we’ve established the real meaning of modesty in the pages of Scripture here are three things we need to stop doing to bring this issue back within the bounds of God’s Word.

Stop Thinking Only of Yourself

Let’s stop saying foolish things like, “As long as your heart is pure then you’re modest.” That’s a good philosophy as long as you’re home by yourself with the curtains drawn. Then, yes, go ahead, if your heart is in the right place you can wear whatever you want!

However, as soon as you add another person to the mix, even if it’s your spouse, then you need to think about more than your intentions in your clothing, you need to think about how your clothing will affect others and your relationship with them.

It’s called being unselfish and thinking of about how your choices affect others, it’s about loving and respecting those around you!

Do not be concerned about your own interests, but also be concerned about the interests of others.
(Php 2:4)

Stop Making Rules for Others

If it’s not a rule that the Bible explicitly gives for us to follow today then maybe we shouldn’t be telling others that they’re in sin if they’re not keeping the rule we made up.

In the context of family or private school or some other private group I have no problem with having a dress code. That can be helpful in bringing order and ensuring decency. However, we need to be careful that we don’t turn those dress codes into God’s Law for humankind!

Let’s show some common grace to others, let’s understand that there are different cultures and with them come a myriad of different standards for dress. Let’s not judge them and let us neither force our man-made rules nor our personal liberality upon them.

One person believes that he may eat anything, while the weak person eats only vegetables. The person who eats any kind of food must not ridicule the person who does not eat them, and the person who does not eat certain foods must not criticize the person who eats them, for God has accepted him.
(Rom 14:2-3)

Stop Showing Off

This seems to be the main emphasis of Paul in his letter to Timothy. The problem wasn’t one of showing too much skin but rather of showing off expensive clothing! Women were drawing attention to themselves rather than to Christ!

God isn’t against beauty, on the contrary he’s the author of it. So be beautiful on the outside but don’t make it the goal of your life! Let the inward beauty of Christ shine so brightly through you that it blinds people to your outward beauty and all they see is Christ.

Stop showing off your clothing and instead show off Christ!

Your beauty should not be an external one, consisting of braided hair or the wearing of gold ornaments and dresses. Instead, it should be the inner disposition of the heart, consisting in the imperishable quality of a gentle and quiet spirit, which God values greatly.
(1Pe 3:3-4)